I am reading a book for a class that I am teaching on Monday. I have already read this book close to ten times and have taught on it before, but each time I read I find something new to ruminate on (aren't those the best kind of books?).

I just had to share this quote, because I think it summed how I felt in the past week:

"As I drove home...I steep in the utter fullness of not wanting to have anyone else's life but my own".

That's about it!

Keep Your Life (Sort of) Private

(WARNING: I realize that the blog post below is being posted publicly online and is complaining about how people post things online. I can live with the contradiction; so should you)

I was sort of set to come on here tonight and talk about how my day at work had been kind of up and down. And then I got a call from a friend from grad school, all about how a former colleague of ours had bashed her employers and workplace on her blog and it had gone viral.

This prompted several reactions from me: "How studpid of her!", "Wow, I'm glad it wasn't me", and "Why do people think this is ok?"

Honestly (see warning at top), the internet kills me in that everyone seems able to share everything whenever they want. It is frustrating when people throw their credibility out of the window by saying things in the heat of the moment in such a passive manner.

I enjoy social media and using it for both personal and professional means. I try, however, to have a good balance between posting nothing and posting everything, being snarky and earnest, and communicating online and in person.

The problem for me is that the internet (and everything that comes along with it) is truly astounding. We have achevied a seeming apex in global communication within about 15 years of commercial use, and yet it seems that all it is used for nowadays is trivializing minor points, shoving your beliefs upon others, and normalizing negative behavior.

Sites like the "secrets" ones that have popped up at every college and university make me sad. People getting into fights about political and social stances are not helping anyone to understand. And not voicing opinions in person (where it's difficult and awkward) but doing so behind the thin veil of the intenet is pretty cowardly (once again, see warning).

I wish we could use the internet in good and proper ways. It is so great to utilize the medium to see pictures of my friends' new baby. And to share what just happened on a good tv show. And to think of something randomly sarcastic and tweet it. Let's use the internet for cool things like that!

And if you wouldn't want your grandma to see it, then don't post it. Just tell me in person instead.

Extroverts vs. Introverts

Due to a recent holiday where a certain religious figure died and rose from the dead in a matter of days, I had an extended vacation from work. This same holiday and its circumstances also meant that I had a lot of friends (read: most of the people I hang out with on a weekend) leave town, while I did not.

This meant that I spent an inordinate amount of time by myself this weekend. Don't expect this post to suddenly turn into something where I discovered the virtue of solitude. The exact opposite happened - it sucked.

I realized (quite glaringly) that I am, in fact, an extrovert. This might seem very obvious if you know me, but I question that it only seems obvious because the term "extrovert" has now been misinterpreted by society to mean "loud", "outgoing", or "talkative". And while I am all three of those things, I am also an extrovert by (I assert) mutually exclusive means.

I say that knowing this: I happen to work with a lot of introverts. This can drive me nuts sometimes. I have also then been able to see a full spectrum of introverts. Some are still external processors. Others are louder than I am. Some are amazing public speakers. They're not all quiet, shy introspective people - who knew?

At the same time, people are surprised to learn that I like to read. "Even though you're extroverted?", they say. Yes, just because I gain energy from others does not mean that I can't enjoy a good legal thriller every now and then.

I am rambling (this is due more to me being a J on the Myers-Briggs scale than my extroversion, I guess). My point is that typology theories (and especially extrovert vs introvert debates) need not be so dualistic. They should instead acknowledge and accept a wide range of characteristics that could fall under such an umbrella.

Meanwhile, I am going to get out of my office and find someone to talk to. All this time with just me and my computer has been draining.

 

I wanted to share with you some stories and information about the alternative spring break trip that I led students on last week. You are more then welcome to skim as necessary! Thanks for indulging me.

Last week, 12 students, another advisor and I all lived and worked in Tacoma, WA. The city is pretty much the Oakland of the Puget Sound - working class families, and a chip on its shoulder to the bigger, more touristy city close by. Still, this city is super cool - they have a Chihuly art glass museum downtown and awesome views of the Sound and Mt. Rainier. The weather was gray and rainy the whole week - what they say about the NW is true, i guess!

We stayed and mainly worked at the Tacoma Catholic Worker House. Together the organization owns 8 hours in a city block in between a newly regentrfied downtown and Hlltop, the worst part of the city. They have several men living with them in various houses who are either formerly homeless or developmentally disabled.

Most of the work we did for the Catholic Worker was general cleanup and maintenance. The guys who work at TCW are hysterical, dedicated, and terrible at maintenance. Seriously. One of them couldn't get their electric drill to work to put a screw in a post. I showed him that you could switch the direction of the drill to make it so that it actually pushed the screw in, and they acted like I had just invented the wheel.

JVC also has a house next door to TCW, so we also got to know the JVs volunteering them well (we also worked with them in some other sites detailed below). The Catholic Worker invited us all over for dinner every night, and it was really a treat to eat and chat with many members of the house after a day of work. We made them dinner on Friday night as a thank-you.

Our other main site was L'Arche Farms. L'Arche communities across the US house and care for adults with developmental disabilities, The Tacoma L'Arche community owns and operates a non-profit farm that it also employs its members at. We worked alongside them for two days, planting seeds, spreading manure, feeding chickens, and a lot more. It was awesome! So really great people working on the farm and they couldn't have been more accomodating and welcoming to us.

We also worked for a few days for Keep Them Fed and Warm (a homeless outreach program) and Nativy House (a homeless intake center) doing random tasks.

The people on the trip really made the experience. The Gonzaga students we went with were open, enegetic, and reflective. We all got to know each other pretty well when sleeping on the floor of a living room for a week straight! Like I said before, we also met and worked with some amazing people who truly care about the homeless and developmentally disabled (and who feel their own lives are bettered by the work they do).

We also got to know Fr. Bix, who is an 86 year old Jesuit living at the Catholic Worker. Bix is the type of guy who is welcoming and unintentionally hilarious. He also supports gay marriage in the church and women's ordination, and he just got out of jail after a couple of years because he was protesting nuclear weapons. Seriously, this guy is so cool. I really enjoyed my conversations with him!

All in all, it was a really, really great time. We learned a lot about the community (and dare I say it, about ourselves too!). And in the meanwhile, Gonzaga won the WCC and a Jesuit got elected Pope. A good week all around!

 

Now it's back to work. It's a strange transition back to "the grind" after a week of meaningful work and reflection. Such is life, I guess!

Work/Life Balance is a myth!

Post below pertains almost exclusively to the type of work I am in - you have been warned.

I got this title from a textng conversation I had with a friend while we were both in our offices on a Sunday. It was sort of a "ha ha, aren't we pathetic that we are both working right now?" sort of feel, but let me tell you, it has helped me to start to figure out the semblence of my life.

This just in - work/life balance is a myth. I feel like I am a much more productive employee once I stop pretending like I can have it all. I concede that I will never truly have seperate lives, especially when I live where I work, my job requires odd hours, and I am friends with many colleagues.

While the above revelations might seem negative, I feel like realizing them (and not dwelling on trying to acheive work/life balance) is actually quite freeing. Now I can stop feeling guilty when I am answering emails on a Sunday night. And I will stop comparing myself to others and how hard they work.

I think a simple reframing of this whole prespective actually helps me to look at this lack of work/life balance in a positive way. I should be grateful that I have a job where I can easily flex out my work time (that just means that i might have to spend a morning in the office on the weekend or at night). As well, I love being in the office on a Saturday and the feeling of productiveness when I have no meetings, no emails, and no phone calls and can just get stuff DONE.

And overall, I feel like I have some outlets that I really enjoy and get me away from work when I need to. And I have friends that couldn't care less about my job, and we get to hang out and talk about really stupid stuff.

So I now pledge to stop constantly striving for something impossible (work/life balance) and find positivity in the little parts of my job that are positively framed.

Why I left Facebook (and why I'm now back)

Why I left Facebook...
This decision was a couple months in the making. I had stopped posting much of anything on the site but still logged on nearly every day, just to see what was going on. My aversion to those who posted every mundane detail of their life led me to think, "I'm better because I'm not posting anything". A conversation with a buddy from grad school in June helped me to realize that I was still taking information from people (photos, funny updates, etc) but not giving anything in return.

So, I decided to deactivate my account for the time being and see how my life changed. And lo and behold, it really didn't. I soon stopped going right onto Facebook after checking my email (Twitter got moved up to number 2!). I didn't suddenly lose contact with a ton of people or have a bunch of new free time.

What I did find was that I was much more intentional about communicating with people. If a song I heard during the day reminded me of someone, I had to call or text them. If it was someone's birthday, I had better put a card in the mail in time or call them on their big day or that was it. I had to ask a friend to see his pictures when he lead a group of students on a service trip to Africa over winter break (remember asking to see friend's pictures/sharing pictures with others? What a seemingly-outdated concept now).

This Facebook deactivation also happened during my birthday. My biggest surprise? The people I still cared about (and who still cared about me) contacted me and wished that I had a good day. I still had a perfectly fine day even without a lot of folks writing on my wall.

So not much changed, but what little changes were positive.


...And Why I'm Back
Truth be told, I am mostly back on Facebook for work-related reasons (developing and managing the FB page for our department). I am trying to be more proactive with my use on there now; if I am spending an inordinate amount of time scrolling down my newsfeed, I either post something or get the hell out of dodge.

I find myself despising the site sometimes still. Apparently it's ok to post your opinion online about anything, regardless of your stance, eduaction on the matter, or likelihood of offending someone (I realize the irony of posting this sentiment online). But I am trying to get over that. And who knows, maybe I'll be off there again the future.